The 6 Environmental Effects Of Falling In Love
January 1st, 2020 is certainly one of the happiest days of my life so far. I can still vividly remember that some weeks before then was the magical moment I had a crush on someone back at home. It felt surreal. I was literally always thinking of that person and I felt really shy when he was talking to me. You should have seen how my face lit up when he wished me a ‘Happy New Year’ on January 1st. Boy! I was excited, no doubt. In fact, that made my day. Did I just say my day? My entire year!
To think that I may have actually fallen in love at that moment of my life still gives me goosebumps and makes my cheeks rosy even now. Though at that time, I was naive and could no longer identify if I was truly in love or not, I know better now. Falling in love is one exciting subject that gives thrills not just to young fellas but also to the old. I’ve watched movies where grandparents were smiling sheepishly at each other. You can’t blame them.
Love is sweet. It is divine! (1 Jn. 4:8). Young fellas are not left out either as they earnestly dream of that perfect moment when the love of their lives would hold their hands with eyes locked on theirs and whisper, ‘I love you.’ Tell me you’ve never had that dream. I dare you.
But going deeper, do you know that there’s a chemistry associated with falling in love? Please, don’t start thinking of those outrageous formulas or chemicals that drove you berserk in high school. Truly, we can’t deny the fact that there are some chemicals involved in falling in love like dopamine and the likes, but for the sake of this, we’ll focus more on the chemistry that means, ‘a mutual attraction between two people most especially those who are romantically involved.’ There are many things that cause this attraction or rather that this attraction causes. And in this piece, we’ll be looking at the environmental aspects of this attraction; this chemistry of falling in love.
Just like we were taught in school, the environment has to do with our surroundings; not just the geographical locations but the entire things around us that influence what we do. By ‘environmental aspects,’ we mean those things we do in our surroundings consciously or unconsciously that stem as a result of our falling in love, which influence our love story and boost the affections we have for our boos and baes. There’s always that picture-perfect place where you met the love of your life. It may have been at the library, at the park, or an even uncommon place like the market. Wherever it was, I believe that place still sparks butterflies within you even today.
Imagine how Jacob must have felt each time he saw the well where he met his beloved Rachel or the grin on Moses’ face each time he came face to face with the well where he met the love of his life -Zipporah (Gen. 29:1-12, Ex. 2:16-21).
Also, can you imagine how you’d feel if you were to visit the place where Jesus died for you on the cross? I mean the exact spot – Golgotha. You’d be thrilled. If you’re unmoved, it only means your heart is stone or you never really had a love encounter with Him. All these go to show to a large extent that the environment does play a vital role in the chemistry of our falling in love.
If you’ve been in the shadows on this, hurrah! There’s some light now. Here are those influences that seem to seize control of your environment once you’re on the fiery roller coaster of emotions called love:
1) THE ‘I’M ALL RICH AND FAMOUS’ SYNDROME:
Now, I have no idea if you may have noticed or not, but when you fall in love, all of a sudden, there’s that desire to make an impression on your bae, especially for the male folk. You suddenly want to be seen in great and famous places where cool money, wealth, and affluence flow like waterfalls. I believe the reason for this is that you suddenly feel that urge to be associated with something that makes your partner feel more interested in you; shows her that you are capable and that you are able to provide for her needs and you’re not a mere nonentity.
You can suddenly feel rushed up to get a new apartment or rent one that looks quintessential and is set to the finest taste. Sometimes, you may even go as far as posing in your friend’s home just so your significant other can feel comfortable around you or so you look financially buoyant to them. This is an environmental aspect that stems from that innate desire associated with the chemistry of falling in love.
2) THE ‘HERE BUT NOT HERE’ SYNDROME:
What makes my younger brother so mad at me at times is the fact that I can get so engrossed with my phone; giggling at the screen, while I just leave him talking as though he were talking to air. This is the same for two lovebirds who are madly into each other. Once those two hands get locked in each other and those eyes meet, just forget about telling them anything again because it’ll all land on deaf ears.
There’s this uncontrollable influence falling in love brings on two people that they just get so lost in a world of their own as they behold each other, even though there could be a billion others in the room. They could be at a coffee shop giggling and talking that they would even forget the poor waiter standing by. All shyness seems suddenly to have lost its age-long spell on them and they can do just anything without minding who is or who is not where they are.
3) THE ‘SPOTLESS AS A DOVE’ SYNDROME:
Can you remember when God asked the Israelites to make themselves clean before Him (Ex. 19:10-11)? If you can’t, I’m here to remind you. God Himself does associate with a clean environment and I don’t think your significant other will expect any less. Because no one likes dirty girls/guys, this aspect of the chemistry of falling in love makes you become overly conscious of yourself and your environment.
Suddenly, you feel this desire or even pressure to make your place look its best, dispose of trash around the house, ditch those frustrating cobwebs off the wall, or quickly arrange those dresses that are stuffing out of your drawer. You find out that you always want your room swept, tidied, and all and you get so mad when someone litters up your space. This feeling is even more intense when you’re expecting a surprise visit from Romeo. You don’t want him thinking you’re dingy Diana, eh?
4) THE ‘MAKE IT LOOK ATTRACTIVE’ SYNDROME:
If you are not gonna look attractive or better still, make your space look attractive, then you defeat the whole idea of this chemistry thing. You know why? Because it is an attraction itself and it has to attract. Got the idea? Personally, I always want my dorm to look attractive at all times especially when someone special is visiting. Being a fella in love pushes you to go the extra mile to add that extra dash of uniqueness to your space.
It can make you extra creative by getting new room ideas. You start thinking of crazy ways to give your space a totally, all-new, impressive look that makes your partner want to love you the more. It can even make you go as far as checking out videos on YouTube. Yeah. It can be that bad. You could get new furniture, add wallpaper, change your curtains, get new fanciable bedspreads, and all that lovey-dovey stuff. In all this, you’re setting the tone for an exciting moment with the love of your life. Thanks to Miss Chemistry.
5) THE ‘ADD A LITTLE MORE ROMANCE’ SYNDROME:
Do you know there’s a certain sensation you have when you’re in a room filled with tons of ‘identity in Christ’ cards that echo God’s love to you especially when you’ve got some lovely ‘Don Moen’ music playing in the background? You just literally feel overwhelmed by God’s love for you. (That’s a little way to be romantic – the God way.)
Now, coming to your own love, falling in love gives you that idea and longing just to make your space alluring, inviting, and romantic to your partner. It could be that you buy new rom-coms so you can add to your movie list for watching by you and yours only; or those beautiful flowers you add to that ancient vase that just happens to be your partner’s favorite; or even that beautiful picture or painting that screams how much you love your partner. Better still, it could even be a painting of him/her. How about playing some lovely romantic music in the background? Woah! In each of these ways, the chemistry of falling in love is being expressed through this cool and romantic environmental aspect.
6) THE ‘AVOID ANYTHING THAT SPEAKS DIRT’ SYNDROME:
My mom often tells me about her love story with a particular guy she was dating in her early years. She told me she was such a darl and her Romeo loved her madly for that. Guess why? She was always tidying up his place, setting things in order, clearing the table, and making his place look spotless. Truly, she was a darl.
Though this sounds in a way like being clean and is in no way to counteract it, it goes further to show that falling in love does not just make you want your space to look its best, but it also spurs the cleanliness effect onto your partner’s space. It keeps you dirt-sensitive and makes you cringe at the sight of any disgusting, unkempt environment. True lovers certainly can’t stand dirty environments. God proved it.
Falling in love is one beautiful and sweet aspect of life everyone dreams of. It comes with its ups, and downs and could make you do really weird stuff or become a better version of yourself. If love makes you want to be cleaner, creative, and attractive, then that’s a plus. Keep falling so hopelessly in love and remember: You’ve got a Lover in Christ.
Toodles and God bless you.
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