10 Creative Ways to Combat Domestic Violence
Many more homes are in upheaval today. More marriages are collapsing, and more kids’ lives are being destroyed. Domestic violence is an evil that leaves an indelible mark on its prey, and it affects both males and females alike. By domestic violence, we mean “any action which causes destruction, pain, or suffering in the home”.
God does not smile at domestic violence or the havoc it wreaks. He desires that we may prosper, be in good health, and live abundantly (3 Jn. 2; Jn. 10:10). However, this is not always the case. So what can be done? Join me as we look at ten creative ways to combat domestic violence. I pray it helps. Stay with me.
1. By Praying And Studying God’s Word Together
Prayer changes things – and people (Jas. 5:16). It is the strand that keeps you both holding on when everything else falls apart. Partners who pray for and with each other find themselves more endeared to each other and are less likely to hurt each other. Again, when couples study the Word of God, they learn the mind of God. When they do, they treat their spouses as they would treat themselves – with love, honor, and respect (Eph. 5:22-33).
2. By Loving Each Other Truly
Love led Jesus to the Cross (Jn. 3:16). Crazy love, huh? Two people decide to be joined together before God in a union like marriage because they “love” each other. What then happens when the very partners they claim to love become the object of their vitriol and mangling? It’s love grown cold. To revive it means going back to learn, as Jesus would, through the lens of 1 Corinthians 13.
3. By Ignoring Each Other’s Faults
Psalm 130:3 talks about if God kept a record of wrongs, who could stand? Some partners take delight in noticing every wrong thing their spouses do, and if they don’t lambast them for it, they keep it laid down in some corner in their heart, till it piles up and they explode. You must learn that every human is imperfect. We’re all prone to mistakes, so learning to intentionally turn a blind eye while still addressing what needs to be addressed will prove helpful.
4. By Seeking to Understand Each Other
If you trace closely, you would realize that many problems in marriages stem from misunderstanding. You may be seeing something from one perspective, while your partner has something totally different in mind. Not long enough and we’re watching a reality show of “Cats and Dogs”. However, when couples seek to understand each other – what turns the other on and what pisses them off- and do their best to act accordingly, the home becomes a haven.
5. By Managing Anger Wisely
Domestic violence often starts from a heart that finds it difficult to manage anger. Once you feel angry, you erupt like a volcano, and in three seconds or less, you have unleashed the titan in you on your partner. James 1:19 and Proverbs 16:32 encourage us to be slow to anger and to rule our temper with the Holy Spirit’s help. Not only that, but to respond to anger with equanimity (Prov. 15:1).
6. By Watching the Counsel You Listen To
Good marriages thrive due to many solid reasons, including good counsel, and a marriage tending to doom also has something lurking somewhere deep within: charlatan marriage counselors. Many passages in the Bible talk about the effect of listening to the wrong counsel (1 Kgs. 12:8; Ps. 1:1; 1 Cor. 15:33). If you do not want to be a partaker in domestic violence, then don’t be in the company of those who do.
7. By Letting Go of Comparison
Comparison breeds discontent and fuels ingratitude. When your eyes are always looking at how snazzy and curved your colleague is or how wealthy and exposed your boss is as compared to your partner, or when you’re always hooked on your colleague’s Instagram feed where she’s all mushy with her husband, your eyes will be closed to the treasure that lies before you and you will be prone to domestic violence.
8. By Making an Effort to Dialogue With Each Other
We already established that all humans are imperfect, so we’re bound to step on each other’s toes in a marital relationship. When you identify a fault that is not picayune and hence cannot be overlooked, speak with your spouse about it maturely. Once in a while, review your relationship and work on areas where you are lagging.
9. By Giving Priority to Respect
If I respect my spouse, then I will value him and treat him with the honor he deserves, not just because he is my spouse, but because he is also a child of God created in His image. The Bible praises Sarah for calling and treating her husband as her lord, not out of inferiority, but out of respect for God, him, and the relationship (1 Pet. 3:6). When we respect our spouses, domestic violence won’t have breathing space in our homes.
10. By Bringing Up Your Children In the Fear of the Lord
The abusive partners we see today were once ebullient kids full of innocence. Somewhere along the line, their minds learned that being abusive connotes power and brings control. Because children learn more effectively from what they see, these negative values are ingrained in them. If we desire a world free of domestic violence, it starts with instilling the right values in the coming generation (Prov. 22:6).·
Finally, it is important to note that domestic violence helps no one. It only adds ruin upon ruin. May we be guided even by the points shared above, as empowered by the Holy Spirit, to behave rightly. More grace to you. Stay blessed.
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