THE ME IN THE MIRROR: WHO DO I SEE? WHO AM I?
Sunday mornings had to be my worst moments ever! Now don’t get me wrong. I loved the chicken and not to mention the red ribbons which stuffed my hair and my gold shoes. But I still hated Sunday mornings. Why? I’ll tell you why…
Ten minutes before we could all get into the car and drive for Sunday school, I would run to my room and stand in front of my huge mirror(which was similar to Barbie’s by the way) and I would sing, ‘Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest one of all?’ I would have given anything to hear my name screamed out but…all I could see staring at me was her: ugly, fat, little miss nerdy – with the glasses and the zit on top.
I would sob silently but cheer up so Mom didn’t have to worry. That was me for a couple of years; struggling to find, know, and even like me. It was so frustrating until I met Someone who helped me out.
Because I’ve been helped, I’m willing to help you too because I know you get this feeling sometimes. But, this will work only if you promise to do every single thing you read. (You don’t have to promise, though. I trust you.) Here goes:
1. WEAR THE J-CAPE (Eph. 4:24, 6:11):
When I met this Someone, He told me to always put on the J-cape. This way, I’d feel like a superhero all the time. I wondered what it was but in time I realized it was an imaginary cape that when I put on, I had all the superpowers I needed. The J-cape is the cape with Jesus’ initials.
So, when I was mocked for being ugly, I’d just put on my J-cape in my mind and I’d be confident that I’m beautiful (we’ve got no ugly superheroes, right?) When I had my cape on who is Christ, I believed I was worth it, beautiful and enough because I had Him and He is all these and more. You should try it too!
2. FIGHT BACK (1 Tim. 6:12, 2 Cor. 10:4-5):
My Friend told me that if I wanted to know the real me, then I needed to be aware I was in a fight. This got me scared at first but I got to learn that there was a battle in my mind and yeah! There’s one in yours too. I learned that I had a sworn enemy and he is the devil. His job is to bring lies that sound so true. But my job was to fight him with my sword, which is God’s Word (Eph. 6:17).
So, when next the devil lies to you that you could never make the cheerleading team because of how fat you are, although it may sound true, tell him boldly that you’re fearfully and wonderfully made in God‘s unique image and even though you don’t make it as a cheerleader, you won’t let that define you. And just so he knows, you’re pretty confident that God has made you just the way He wants and will place you right where He needs you to be.
3. CREATE YOUR OWN ‘WHO I AM’ STUDIO:
I bet there are some goofy pictures of vampires in your room or your room’s ‘princessy’ pinkish. I’ve got new room ideas for you. Why don’t you consider getting lots of sticky notes and filling them up with great things God has said about you (Ex. 17:14).
It will be more fun to attach photos of other courageous Bible kids like David, Joseph, and Josiah along with it. Make them as colorful and eye catchy as possible. You could even use glitter. Then hang them somewhere obvious in your room so that when next you feel worthless, you’ll see a bold picture telling you that you’re a Child of God made worthy in Christ (2 Thess. 1:5, Rev. 3:4).
4. JOIN A ‘WHO I AM IN CHRIST’ CLUB:
I was part of a few physical clubs and tons of others I watched on television. My Friend advised me to join a club where we could play fun games, watch healthy movies, and connect with other individuals who were just like me (2 Tim. 2:22). In this way, I no longer felt so bad that I was ugly and fat. I felt accepted and loved just for being who I am. Wanna try this too? I bet. (Hint: Making ‘Who I am’ bracelets sounds like fun!).
5. TELL MOM:
Although I had dad too, he was always busy in meetings. At first, I was too scared to tell Mom because I felt she wouldn’t get me and would wonder why I couldn’t just be as beautiful and free-spirited as Zoey, my younger sister. Guess what? I was wrong. After a long conversation with my Friend, I made the decision to tell Mom.
I felt like Moana that day though I got a little scared when her eyes were fixed on mine. After our pretty long talk (I had to endure 97 minutes of talk. It was really hard.), I felt good and Mom promised to make a conscious effort to infuse inner strength into me and told me often that she was proud of me. Consider talking to someone trustworthy, will you?
6. LOVE YOUR ZIT (2 Cor. 11:30, 12:9, Heb. 4:15):
‘Really? But that’s what makes me awful.’ That was exactly what I said when my friend said I should love my ‘zit.’ Loving what you think makes you awful can be hard but it’s what makes you unique. Just imagine if God made everyone the same, then you’d be just like everyone else – no extra flavor. You’d look just like everyone else (this sounds good) but you’ll be bored soon enough. Pizza tastes wonderful because it’s made of different ingredients; some of which look less appealing. But that’s what makes the whole pizza unique; just like you make the world unique – with your ‘zit.’ Remember that.
7. UNLOCK YOUR TREASURE (1 Tim. 4:14, 2 Tim. 1:6):
I probably always thought I was not beautiful enough, worthless, and ugly because I only saw the bad in me. I was always trying to be the good I saw in others when I was a whole bunch of goodness myself. My Friend advised me to find all that was within me because God doesn’t create trashcans. Even if we choose to be trashcans, it doesn’t change the fact that there’s so much treasure in us. I discovered I was really good at Math and I write well too (P.S: That’s why I’m writing to you now). There is so much in you and if you’ll ask God, He’ll show you just how rich you are!
8. KEEP A ‘WHO I AM’ JOURNAL (Ex. 17:14, Esth. 10:2):
After a beautiful discussion with my Friend over popcorn, He told me something great and I’ll share it with you. He told me to get a journal, write out verses from God’s Word that shape my identity in Christ, and speak them out every morning before school (Josh. 1:8). He also told me to carry this journal and remind myself of who I was anytime I got bullied. I also wrote a list of beautiful things about me and asked God to show me how to use them for His glory.
Documenting every day of my identity journey; my highs, lows, and mids, became the most thrilling part of my day (P.S.: I still do this.) I desired as I wrote that someday, my story would be a blessing to someone and I guess it is now to you. So, what art thou waiting for? Get a journal and get creative. You’ll be wowed by who you discover you are in Christ.
Finding who I was was not as easy as biting cake but it was sure worth it. I now boldly look in the mirror and you know what I see? I see a beautiful princess, God’s priest who is worthy and deserving of His blessings; God’s creative masterpiece, and His dearly beloved daughter (Jn. 1:12, 1 Pet. 2:9, Eph. 2:10). All through it, I had my Friend who made it worth it and He wants to be your friend and help you out.
Will you let Him?
With love, Mene.