What Men Hate About Women: Having Too Many Male Friends – Marriage And Relationship

What Men Hate About Women: Having Too Many Male Friends – Marriage And Relationship


In no way is this a study or an article on misogyny, and when we talk about what men hate about women, we do not suggest that men are misogynists. Men do not dislike women but might dislike some of the acts, habits, or characters they exhibit.

Now, having too many male friends is one character that men detest about their women. Please, we do not say to have a friend from the opposite sex is bad but we are saying that having “too many” friends who are males might not be welcome by some men. This is something that men hate about women. I understand that this could be controversial at times depending on culture and motive for keeping them (men) around you as a lady.

To have many male friends, again, as a female isn’t a bad thing basically, but can be misleading, and wrong considering several factors. Some women have many males friends because they grew up in an environment where men were dominant in numbers.

Some families I know have too many brothers for just a single sister. Such a sister, for example, might easily find male friends to keep without hassle and feel comfortable among the male circle than when with females. So a man who just detest women for having male friends without digging deep to know the reasons and motive behind it such a character would want to think again and review his stance.

The Fears

One of the reasons that men fear the multitude of male friends around a female partner is because they have this thing in their mind about sexual immorality which breeds jealousy and amorous discomfort. But they shouldn’t forget that even the female gender can teem around another female for sexual and immoral purposes too.

The lesbians, for example, are attracted not to males but females so to say. You may fear the male friends for coming around your woman and avoid them, but allow the female friends who might do just the same immoral acts with your lady. Therefore, the motive should be at the core of your fears and should drive your actions. To me, my position is clear: choose your friends wisely, be it male or female. The Bible says that the righteous are cautious to make friends. They choose their friends carefully (Proverbs 12:26 ).

Carefully implies to consider the motive of keeping someone as a friend. A person who adds no value to your life shouldn’t be around you. There’s nothing wrong with having male friends, but there’s everything wrong if the friends are to destroy your marital home. Any friend, be it male or female, who doesn’t respect your household shouldn’t come close to it. You have to discipline yourself to know how to avoid friends of no marital value.

For a single lady out there with many male friends, check the motives of these friends. If you do, you might find out that some of them are close to you just to get to your pants. Period. And if you intentionally keep many male friends around you, without being selective, it could be seen as if you’re promiscuous and reduces your chances of contracting your destined relationship with your destined partner. If you’re married and your man doesn’t like males around you, stop it then, as simple as that. You cannot choose an outsider, whether friend or not, over your spouse. Hell NO!

A Show Of Disrespect To The Relationship

The Bible says to be watchful and prayerful which is applicable to any love relationship (Matthew 26:41). The area to particularly pay attention to when it comes to having too many male friends for a married lady or a lady in a relationship or even a single lady without any relationship but aspires for one is the relationship in question. If you keep too many male friends around you, there will be a lack of respect for your current relationship which would manifest in the following ways:


1. Unsolicited Visits At Home. You would find that your woman has male friends unknown to you visiting her at home whether you are there or not. And the visits are usually unannounced and without invitation.

2. At Offices And WorkPlaces. At the workspace, you can have unwarranted male colleagues who might be out of bounds in their friendship with a lady. A wise lady, both married or not, needs to put this in check and curb whatever isn’t work-related.

3. Time Consuming And Distorted Focus. This attitude to keep male friends around a female might take much of her time and distort her focus, whether in chatting, hanging out, texting, etc. The manifestation is sure when the attention of the lady is limited to her spouse, but unhinderedly made available to the male friends around her. Calling someone’s wife anyhow any time of day by another male friend is a thing that calls for questions.

4. The Lack Of Respect For Her Husband. This is made very explicit, demonstrated in a way that onlookers, outsiders, or even the husband in question, cannot miss the point. When men flock around a female in the name of friends, they usually lose respect for the lady’s man, whether boyfriend or husband. Sometimes, they feel so comfy and playful with the wife in the presence of the husband. And to add more salt to injury, these men might not even greet the husband at all or properly, and the wife finds no fault with that and does nothing about that. In order words, she encourages it. This is very serious, for it can break the relationship.

5. The Husband Feels Threatened. Understandably so, when there’s no respect for the wife’s husband because of the many male friends she keeps around her, the husband begins to feel, not just jealous but threatened by that singular attitude. It’s like a threat to the husband’s authority. And feels like a sword through the soul.

Finally, In marriage you don’t need a lot of friends, you just need the right friends. These are the people that would help shape your marriage whether they are married too or not, but they bring added value to your family. They can counsel you, pray for, and with you, support you, and be there for you when you need them. They do not gossip about you or betray you. They do not strive to break your relationship or take your partner away from you. Above all, please understand that it’s okay even to have no friends at times. Yes, sometimes you need “alone time” all by yourself. And do not forget that what men hate about women is having too many male friends.



Written for smartcouples.net © 2020. All rights reserved



About the author

Charles E. Is an author, a journalist, a relationship pundit and site administrator.
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