The 11 Signs of spousal disrespect — Marriage And Relationship
When we talk about signs in relationships, whether negative or positive, we are referring to occurrences in the relationships which indicate the probable presence of something else. In marital relationships, a sign kind of acts as a pointer of progress, of something expected, of an impending issue or an existing one.
Marriage is a love relationship contracted by at least two consenting adults called spouses, who trust each other, love and appreciate one another as long as life keeps them together. However, in marital relationships, there are some signs of disrespect to your partner, which couples unwittingly do and bring harm to their relationship in the short or long run. This article aims at strengthening relationships by uncovering the 11 Signs of spousal disrespect common to our society. These signs are as follows:
1. To Flirt Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect
I don’t know how you may see it but flirt is on top of the list. Although limited to spousal relationships or when you are in a relationship, flirting with someone else is a sign of disrespect to your partner whether male or female. It may look okay when you are still searching but never appropriate for those in a relationship to flirt with others.
Let me make it clear here. Whenever you behave as though attracted to someone else when you are married is a disrespect to your spouse. If you’re trying to attract someone while you are already in a relationship, that’s flirting and out of place for married couples. Ignorantly, some people do this for amusement rather than with serious intentions. Whether for amusement or teasing, it’s inappropriate and misleading. You can easily philander and break relationship vows. It is a sign of disrespect for your husband or wife. If you care for your lover, stop it now!
2. To Lust Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect
To have lust for another person that you aren’t married to, whilst you are legally married to your spouse, or are in a relationship with a different person is another sign of disrespect to your spouse or partner. By lust, I mean sexually desiring someone else other than the person to whom you are married. When you love your partner, being salacious and prurient is out of place and inappropriate when the person in question isn’t your spouse or partner. Some people fall for this easily and take it lightly. But the truth be told, it’s a sign of disrespect to the object of your love.
3. To Be Aggressive Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect
Aggression is another sign of disrespect to your spouse. Your spouse is and should be the object of your love, and the word LOVE should be underscored as it leads every action expressed towards that individual. If love leads, there’s no room for hostility or violent behavior toward one another. To be hostile and very ready to attack or confront your spouse is a sign of disrespect to your partner. Period!
4. To Nag Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect
Nagging is also a sign of spousal disrespect in a relationship. The constant fault-finding in places where there’s none. Or the constant harassment of your partner to do what you want them to do in the way you want it done could be very annoying and irritating to the one whom you say you love. To nag goes both ways—done either by the husband or wife–and sometimes highlights an underlying issue or issues in the relationship. Nagging at times comes as a result of insecurity and the lack of trust in a relationship and can put out the peace in your relationship. Nagging is one of the 11 signs of spousal disrespect in a relationship.
5. To Use Coarse Speech Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect
Coarse jokes or speech is yet another sign of spousal disrespect in a relationship. If your partner usually uses vulgar language when communicating to you, there’s something wrong with that relationship. It’s a sign of disrespect, and some couples find it very oafish and offensive. This includes coarse jokes which are out of place. This is one of the things that the Bible tells us to put away from our lips (Ephesians 5:4).
I must add that some couples don’t mind at all when they use vulgar words to joke about each other. Well, may I say “knowing” the limits and “respecting borders” should guide such couples. If you know your partner well, that wouldn’t be a problem at all. Know what is right and welcome in your relationship, and what isn’t. If he or she doesn’t like inappropriate jokes or the use of vulgar language then don’t use it to hurt his or her feelings. If they like and are fine with it, well, do what makes you happy as couples.
6. To Compare Your Spouse To Others Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect
Spousal Comparison is another sign of spousal disrespect that exists in relationships. Whether male or female, husband or wife, we are all different and can never be the same. Therefore, there is no need to compare anybody to anyone else. Everyone is special, unique and peculiar. This implies that you would always see the difference between people.
Because we all are different, You would always see the “why” some people are not the same. So cherish the difference rather than let it trouble your family relationship. While we can learn from people, it’s wrong to complain about your spouse just because they aren’t like the spouse in your head. Don’t insult your husband’s feelings by telling him how he should have been because of the qualities you saw in other men. Respect and accept him for who he is and work with him to be the man of your dream.
Similarly, don’t body shame your wife because of the ladies in your head. You can help her be whatever you want her to become by accepting her, cooperating and working with her. Comparison is one of the 11 spousal disrespect in a relationship.
7. To Walk Away When Your Spouse Talks To You Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect
This is another sign of spousal disrespect in a relationship when you walk out while your spouse is talking to you. There are relationships in which partners are frustrated by the words of their spouses. They can’t stand hearing them talk because when they do, their speech is full of insults, discouraging and negative remarks. It always brings bad vibes when they hear their spouses speak.
Whenever your spouse talks to you, you feel down and demeaned. At times, one partner usually gets drunk and walks in talking trash. Since nothing good can come out their mouth, one partner resolves to walk away whenever they hear the other talking. Or they may walk away just to avoid a fight or arguing with each other.
There are underlying causes to this issue and it’s wise to address the issues head-on than to be reactive all the time. It’s understandable when you walk away to avoid problems with the one you love. But check to see if your action is not just stemming from sheer stubbornness and utter disgust of something. Find out what it is and deal with it.
8. To Be Silent When You Should Talk Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect
It is another sign of spousal disrespect in a relationship to be quiet when a word is expected of you. There’s the good and bad side to silence. Silence could be seen as wisdom in certain situations. People think that you are wise when you maintain some level of silence in a situation in order to calm it and not let things flare out of control. The Bible tells us that too (Proverbs 17:28).
However, there’s another kind of silence that is misconstrued. This is the silence which one maintains when he or she should talk. At times in a relationship, disagreement can lead to a kind of silence which is seen as a form of insult, a manifestation of anger, stupidity, and disrespect to your spouse. When your spouse talks to you and expects an answer, you just stay put without uttering a single word. And this can go on forever breaking down communication between you and your spouse and your family. It’s difficult to be in a relationship where people don’t talk to each other because of unresolved issues. Again, this is a sign of spousal disrespect.
9. To Speak Evil Of Your Spouse Outside Of Home Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect
To talk about your lover, partner or spouse negatively to others who don’t live with you is a sign of spousal disrespect in a relationship. With the aim of strengthening the relationship between the two of you, you can submit to some kind of authority or someone to whom you are accountable for the purpose of resolving an existing family or relationship issues.
This is an exception with a different goal energized by love. With this love-driven exception, you can say the truth of what’s happening within your matrimonial home which might include the good, bad, and ugly. Here you are uncovering the evil deeds of your spouse to someone who can help. Note that you’re not creating an evil image of your spouse to let people see them as evil whereas they aren’t.
Besides these love-driven intentions, any act of evil speaking about your spouse to outsiders is an act of disrespect to your spouse, whether you believe it or not.
10. To Tolerate Others Slander Your Spouse Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect
Whenever you allow others to speak evil about your spouse in your face, you are disrespecting your spouse outside of the home. You must always take a position whenever you hear something concerning your personal relationship. This is really not people’s business, however, to say nothing doesn’t help it either. People all have opinions about something, this includes yourself, but the opinion you allow becomes yours as well. Whatever you permit is what happens. Inaction is action too you know?
You might say but what should I do? You can do a lot to stop them by telling them that you disagree with what they are saying. Let your position be clear enough and if that doesn’t deter them, walk away. Don’t just sit there and watch. Let your disapproval be known.
You cannot stop a bird from flying over your head, but you can stop it from building its nest on your hair. You can’t stop people from talking or airing their opinions, but you can stop them from talking into your head or mind. You have the choice of your own opinions and also the choice to accept or refute their opinions. But understand that the opinions you tolerate become yours as well. That’s what happens when you do nothing when the people around you are entertaining you with lies or degrading things about your spouse right in your face.
Do not let anyone disrespect your spouse in your face. Any such disrespect is disregard to your own person. Remember that you both are one. If they are burning the home because of your spouse, the home is yours too. Thus, they are directly or indirectly burning your home too.
11. To Raise Your Voice At Your Spouse Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect
Raising your voice and talking back at your spouse is a sign of spousal disrespect in a relationship. It may be to raise your voice when your spouse talks to you, even in a beautifully non-violent manner. It may be to raise your voice to shut your spouse up before they even talk at all. It may be that hearing your spouse’s voice provokes you into shouting at them. Whatever the situation, it’s not right to shout at your spouse or raise your voice at them, especially when this conduct is perpetual. It’s an act and a sign of disrespect to your spouse, very unpleasant in the sight of onlookers, and undermines their authority.
In concluding the 11 signs of spousal disrespect, we’ve just said that 1. To Flirt Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect 2. To Lust Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect 3. To Be Aggressive Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect 4. To Nag Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect 5. To Use Coarse Speech Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect 6. To Compare Your Spouse To Others Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect 7. To Walk Away When Your Spouse Talks To You Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect 8. To Be Silent When You Should Talk Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect 9. To Speak Evil Of Your Spouse Outside Of Home Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect 10. To Tolerate Others Slander Your Spouse Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect and 11. To Raise Your Voice At Your Spouse Is A Sign Of Spousal Disrespect
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