The Human Nature Is Not The Weakness Of Couples
Every relationship has its own pain best known to the couples alone. No one is perfect in this life. What you have might be what another person is seeking. What you may take for granted could be what other people are willing to die for. A partner that comes to your life easier doesn’t imply that he or is cheap to get.
So take none for granted. Consider none as cheap because they are with you. And don’t make your partner feel uncomfortable in your presence because of their weaknesses. With practical examples, I intend to help you see that the human nature is not the weakness of couples. And to motivate you to be of support to your partner whenever you discover an area of weakness in your relationship.
The word “Weakness” is used in its broader sense which includes anything you know about your partner that can make your partner uncomfortable in your presence. It also includes any physical disability that puts your partner at a disadvantage position in your presence. Furthermore, it includes the natural mistakes of daily living which couples perceive as weakness. The mistakes that are as a result of the human nature, whether behavioral, mannerisms, caprices or the quirky moments for which your partner might not be comfortable in your presence. The human nature is not the weakness of couples at all.
Declining Romantic Approach
You cannot stop kissing your spouse and decline being romantic because of halitosis which is bad breath. You cannot disrespect and insult your spouse because of bad body odor. These might seem small to some people but there are couples whose homes fell apart because of bad body odor and bad breath. And these are things which are natural with humans but just need an increased level of hygiene.
Spouses shouldn’t look at these as signs of weakness to take advantage of over the other. And they shouldn’t ignore them either. Rather they should communicate with each other about the areas that they find as weakness and propose options to get it better and more conducive for their romantic.relationship. Some of which might need medical attention and others might just need their cooperation to make changes in their lifestyles. Whatever it may be just understand that the human nature is not the weakness of couples.
Farting In The Presence Of Your Spouse
Can farting bring about marital problems at home? You know farting is natural, don’t you? Farting, also called flatulence, is a normal part of digestion that reflects the activity of the bacteria in your gut. Couples do fart, but some farts can stink offensively which might irk one partner to overreact. Some also can be bearable if done once or twice in the presence of others. But if it becomes a daily pattern, a habit, it can be really problematic to the couple in question, which can develop from bitter arguments to physical marital abuse.
Some couples have experienced serious domestic violence because of farting. Let me say rather because of uncontrollable acts of farting within the living space at home. Everyone farts. We all do or don’t YOU? I do and I am sure you do as well. Perhaps yours is bearable than mine.
The Preadolescence Experience
Oh! I recall the days at school when I was becoming a teenager and my friends looked at me and noticed what I never even thought about for once. They admired me because they never saw me fart and believed that I never farted in life. Ha-ha-ha! What a deception! Their admiration gave me mixed feelings. I had a bloated self-confidence that made me too self-conscious which was a problem of its own.
I knew I never farted, oops! I mean, I never farted in people’s presence. But the fact that I never farted in their presence made me be too concerned about why I shouldn’t fart in their presence. At least not lose the newly found respect that I was enjoying.
Plans To Take Me Down
It got to a point that friends planned to take me down. They monitored me closely to “Catch” me in any “Private farting spree” in order to make a fuss out of it. But they never caught me farting for once. They persisted but also wondered if I really did fart in life. Don’t forget that these were preteen students back in the days when technology wasn’t at its best.
In their persistence to take me down, they followed me to the toilet and immediately after using the toilet, they would rush in just to perceive if my poop actually stinks too. Anyway, enough of this now.
Signs Of Good Health
But everyone farts and no fart emits perfume. There’s no fragrance in farting and it should be done respectfully in the midst of others. Couples, however, must understand that using the toilet and farting are part of human life. You cannot do without them. They are a great sign of life and good health.
In fact, if you haven’t gone to the toilet for some time now and you’ve been eating all along, you need medical attention. Because it’s abnormal and unhealthy. I agree that you can stay for many days without passing out stool when you are fasting and without eating food, but not when you are eating.
There are couples who make the lives others miserable because of farting. Like we have said, farting has no pleasing fragrance, and should be done with romantic decorum for your lover. However, couples should support each other and not find fault with that. Some couples find it very okay if one does it in the midst of the other. And this is my take too. There’s no problem with that. The human nature is not the weakness of couples.
The Vulnerability Of Couples
If you don’t like the way your partner does it, respectfully communicate it to them rather than allowing it to affect your love for each other and divide the home. Every partner is vulnerable like a child to each other. They should protect each other in that area of vulnerability. If your spouse is not conformable to fart in your presence, in whose presence would he/she find comfort? Farting should not be an area of weakness at all. It’s part of our human nature. And the human nature is not the weakness of couples. If at all you consider it a weakness, okay then, be the strength
The Monthly Menstruation
Another example of the natural mistakes of daily living which must not be seen as a sign of weakness is the area menstruation. Some males demean their female counterparts because of their menstrual cycle which they find offensive and spiritually contaminating. Both of which are a gross display of ignorance and mendacity.
Era Of Grace
Some cite the Old Testament Scriptures where the Lord talked about the uncleanness of women and what they should do at the moment of menstruation. But they forget the fact that that was then in the past and belongs to that era since the coming of Jesus Christ to earth. We aren’t in the Old Testament but the in New Testament Era which is the Era of Grace. Grace leveled the field for everyone.
With Grace, the legalistic requirements for women and men don’t count anymore. And remember that God created women that way, I mean, with their monthly menstrual cycle. It’s a sign of good health and fertility and should be celebrated. For there are women who don’t even see their periods for years and they aren’t pregnant either. To see your period monthly is a blessing and male spouses should be happy about it and treat their spouses well during such painful periods.
The Healed Lady
I remember one night at about 10 p.m. when I was studying the Bible and the Lord told me that someone was coming. When I paused to inquire why the visit, immediately, there was someone knocking on the door. I opened and a young lady in her twenties walked in. She wanted prayers because she hadn’t seen her period for several years and thought it was normal, thinking that one day it might come. But her friends helped her to know that it wasn’t normal.
Maybe you reading this right now have not seen your period for some time and you think that it’s okay because you are very young and unmarried. But hear this, No! It’s not normal! It’s not okay. You need medical attention. Go and seek advice from qualified medical practitioners to tell you how abnormal it is and if there’s no solution, God has one for. That’s the good news right there! Go to God in prayers for a solution.
Lest I forget, I didn’t pray for the lady at all. But the Lord who told me that someone was coming immediately healed her right in front of me. There in my study, the menstruation which she hadn’t seen for years started to come. And the rest was history.
The Growing Pastor
In one of my counseling sessions, I advised a Pastor to pray at home together with his family, an act he avoided because he would be contaminated spiritually. I really did not know where he got that from. He said he neither prayed nor slept with wife on the same bed just because the wife was on her Period. That was very incorrect and unfair to the wife. But he got my message and got things straightened out. Sometimes what we need is just to educate our ignorance. To hear the truth. To receive advice and heed it.
Do not isolate your wife because she is menstruating, in fact, that’s when she needs your support and comfort. Don’t mistreat her. Don’t call her names because you find the experience dirty. Help clean her up. Assist her with whatever you can and know that she needs to make her experience a joyful and comfortable one. Because this is part of the person you married. It’s part of the life she experiences monthly. And that, in extension, is part of your own life too. Whatever happens to her during her period affects you too. So be very kind to your spouse and never consider such experience a point of weakness at all. To the females, don’t forget to stay clean! The human nature is not the weakness of couples.
Adapted from the teachings of the Reverend PC Akubueze
Used Under Permission